Contentiousness seems to be one of the defining characteristics of our time.
We see it in the rising number of road rage incidents and public flip outs caught on video.
Media talk shows regularly devolve into heated shouting contests.
Online discussions and social media have become a kind of virtual octagon where combatants rhetorically battle to the death over every issue imaginable.
Finding a sense of personal peace in such an environment isn’t easy but it is possible.
As Paul Rosenberg says, it’s found in losing the need to win.
This doesn’t mean that we bury our heads in the sand or detach from everyone around us.
It simply means that we stop making it a priority to get the better of those with whom we disagree.
We all know individuals who become dogmatic and defensive whenever they encounter a differing viewpoint.
And, yes, sometimes we are that person.
The need to be right can transform us from a reasonable human being into an angry caricature of ourselves.
Losing the need to win starts with the recognition that the biggest opponent we face is the person in the mirror.
Once we’ve paid the price to know for ourselves what is true or right, we don’t need to convince others of how right we are.
At that point we’re free to plant seeds of truth without insisting that others agree with us.
When this is done out of a sense of love rather than pride, the results can be quite positive.
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