The Art of De-escalation

No matter how carefully we may step, there’s always going to be a chance of encountering conflict as we go about our lives.

Sometimes people will try to provoke us deliberately, other times they may simply be having a bad day or reacting poorly to stress.

This is where understanding the art of de-escalation can come in handy.

When we are confronted by someone who is speaking or behaving aggressively, it can be tempting to try to raise our volume or take a more aggressive stance in response.

A better approach is to lower our voice and quietly say, “I’m sorry, I couldn’t understand that. Could you say that again?”

Police officers will often do this to prompt a calmer response in someone who is agitated.

When someone offers an insult or tries to provoke us to anger with fighting words, we can often turn the tables by simply pausing for a moment and then quietly asking, “Are you all right?”

The key to de-escalation is finding the strength to pause and mentally gather ourselves rather than responding reflexively.

If someone remains intent on trying to verbally provoke us, there’s nothing wrong with walking away and denying them the reaction they’re seeking.

While deescalation sounds pretty easy in theory, it can be difficult in practice.

Once we allow ourselves to become emotionally engaged, we’re more likely to lose control.

The more time we have spent developing our self control, the more likely we’ll be able to pull it off successfully.

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