Owning Stuff Is Fun But It Will Not Make You Happy

Spoiler Alert:Serving others and building lasting relationships will make you happy!

Photo by D Jonez on Unsplash

My chief Ally, Brian Hyde, recently posted “Where Happiness is Found.”

I always enjoy digesting what Bryan has to share. 

This piece not only resonated with me but prompted several thoughts. I started to respond in the reply section of his post.

I began writing, commenting my little heart out. More and more thoughts accumulated! Ah, too many words to post as a reply.

So, here is my reply as a follow-up post to what Bryan had to say.

Stuff

We are obsessed with material things in our prosperous Western cultures. We tend to equate success with the accumulation of wealth and possessions. Culturally, we prioritize wealth over substance, earnings over relationships, and appearance over authenticity. 

A false narrative and belief that happiness is directly tied to material success.

Buying stuff is fun!  And addictive.

The shopping experience triggers dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, estrogen, and testosterone. A natural high. And it feels good!

So does showing off our stuff.

But we intuitively know the true source of happiness lies elsewhere.

Service

We are blessed to have several extended family members serving missions abroad for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

It’s always gratifying to watch these young adults grow and come to the realization of what lasting joy is through their service.

Very recently, two young men serving in different countries opposite each other on the globe made these observations in their weekly email home.  

Here is one:

When people move, “they just throw everything they own in the back of a truck and head off to their new place. Sometimes they will tie a couple of things down. People in the States have so much stuff. You could fit almost everything that someone owns just in the living room of one of your houses. We are blessed in the States. Going to church is what makes people happy not stuff.”

And another:

“The people here are so impoverished but they are the happiest, most loving people on the face of the earth!”

All of our boats, four-wheelers, skis, RVs, ocean cruises, dream houses, etc., are definitely fun.

And sometimes, our “stuff' makes it possible to create experiences that lead to happy memories and a lasting sense of belonging. For instance, enjoying a ski trip with your kids and grandkids is difficult without the necessary equipment. Or, fishing without tackle is futile unless you're an experienced noodler (catfishing using only your hands).

But the experience and interaction create happiness, not the stuff.

You get the point.

It is those simple gestures and experiences that provide lasting memories and joy. 

Here are three examples among many that come to mind of what makes me happy.

My Wife

Reaching out to hold my wife’s hand in the dark of night, the response of her squeezing my hand back, and then falling back asleep feeling safe and content. Or that moment when the light hits her face just right in that certain way to highlight all of her perfect features and feminine beauty, causing my love for her to overflow.

Kids and Grandkids

One time, I was dealing with a difficult and stressful situation at work. Then, my daughter walked into my office unannounced simply because she “wanted to come by and say hi.”

Immediately, my granddaughter clambered onto my lap, cupped my face in her chubby little hands, and stared into my soul through her cerulean blue eyes. In that state, for several moments, the two of us enjoyed a private conversation of eternal measure and consequence without ever saying a word. Suddenly, what was so pressing and important only a few minutes ago was swallowed up in joyful love.

Puppies

Lucy Van Pelt comes to mind, a crabby, bossy, opinionated, "fussbudget," character in Charles Schultz's comic strip “Peanuts.” 

Despite her tough exterior, Lucy also displayed moments of sharp wit, complexity, and tenderness.

Lucy nailed it in the comic strip's April 25, 1960 edition when she observed, “Happiness is a warm puppy." 

Yes, indeed! That saying became famous for a good reason. The simple love of a warm puppy can lighten any heavy mood.

Lasting Joy

Wealth and material possessions can contribute to a more satisfying life if viewed as a sign of temporal success rather than a source of eternal happiness. 

Lasting happiness results from nurturing personal relationships, engaging in meaningful work, and contributing positively to the community. That is, to serve one another with pure intent.

Stuff is fun. But do we really need any of the material stuff to be happy?

I don’t think so. That’s my opinion on the matter, and I’m sticking to it! 

Thanks for reading and thinking for yourself!

Russell Anderson

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P.S. Please comment and share. What simple things in life make you happy?